ROCKSTAR (LIFE) UPDATE:
My mom just got back from Europe – she was there over Mother’s Day, so I went
home for a visit today… The Jays game was somehow more interesting to her than
me.
ME: So Mom, when you were in Europe, did you get me any gigs?
MOM: Let me think about it…
Not in Denmark,
not in Germany,
not in Swede,
not in Finland,
I don’t want you working in Moscow, that’s too dangerous,
not in Poland, I guess I didn’t Mike.
ME: Hmph, did you find me any wives?
MOM: Oh yeah, lots. Lots of Beautiful Women, all over, everywhere, like everywhere. EVERYWHERE.
ME: So where are they?!
MOM: They’re over there Mike, waiting for you to arrive; “My son is coming!”
ME: Did you give then my email, or phone number, or anything?
MOM: Nooooo, nooooo, although – the only picture I had was from your last birthday, with the foil hat you made and your tongue hanging out, nothing’s going to impress them Mikey… This is what they saw Mikey, you can have that – “He’s kind of a funny guy…He’s really smart, you can’t tell, but he’s nice?” It was embarrassing. I tried.
ME: I remember months after my accident, must’ve been a year after, I remember you saying to me, all concerned, you were dead serious; “I’m confused Mikey, people think you are nice.” And you were all distraught about it.
MOM: Yeah, well…
Piscotty and Semen, what are those announcers talking about?
Attached: My Mother’s Day Card, I don’t know why she’s never impressed with me.. Do NOT tell her I posted this!
